If I Were Filthy Rich...

When I went shopping, I would have the store close down so that I didn't have to use the dressing rooms. Is it just me or is it really annoying to have to keep putting on your pants every time you want to leave the dressing room?

I would buy a dolphin. Yes a dolphin. Where would I keep it? In my dolphin sustainable swimming pool of course!

I would get tickets for my brother and I to sit courtside for all the Suns games. I would also buy him his above the ground coffin thing complete with the recliner and TV that he requested.

For my dad, a library full of books. And a rocking chair on his front porch so that he can successfully become that crazy old man that yells at all the neighborhood kids passing by.

My mom would get the worlds best coupon book. Sounds cheap but that is because you haven't seen how excited my mom gets over coupons.

I would buy enough small spoons and aprons so that when we run out Amie will not have to take the big spoon and the dishtowel.

For Amie I would buy her a house next to mine with a fully equipped cake shop in the basement for all her baking experiments. It would be better than Ace of Cakes. I would also buy her a prince charming but unfortunately he does not come with a price tag. Sorry Ames.

Tarah would get a new longboard and Matt Costa. He would serenade her everyday.

I would build the worlds biggest closet so that it could contain all my shoes.

I would buy a house for my friends that they could come and go as they please. When you walk in there would be a chocolate fountain there to welcome you.

I would build a preschool, and a restaurant.

I would hire a driver to drive me and my limo around everywhere. I would be his co-pilot and we would sing to there radio together wherever we went. I would only hang out in the back if I wanted to sleep.

I would get a jet that had all my favorite people and things painted on it. You know there is going to be guacamole on it and that spokesguy for Mac. For some reason I have an unexplainable crush on him.

Unfortunately I am not filthy rich so Ames must settle with the big spoon, I will continue to wear my pants while shopping and it is not very likely that you will ever see a jet with the Mac spokesguy on it. How disappointing.

My Best Friend

What I Miss Most.

 Scripture Night with Tarah.  There was no better way to start off the week than having scripture study with one of my best friends.  Don't ask me why but during one of our weekly scripture studys we decided to act out the scene in Numbers (the story about the talking donkey). It is the odd times like this that I miss.  I would give anything to have these nights back.  

I Love My Mom!

What is considered underwear these days is ridiculous. But I say hey, its a free hat courtesy of Victoria's Secret. You can't go wrong there. My mom has excellent photography skills. I asked her if the picture turned out okay and she said it looked great. I said "How could you describe a picture as great when the girl in it has a G-String on her head?" Now that was a moment of deep laughter. Yet another reason why my mom is so cool.

Work... or is it?

I am lucky enough to have not only one but two jobs that I absolutely love. One of them is working at a Preschool and the other is working with people who have disabilities. Although I have been told to "go to hell" and I have had to stay up multiple nights to care for a sick clients, I feel like in the end it is very rewarding. Does it take patience? YES! but I like to look at them as normal people with a lot of extra quirkiness about them. No two days are ever the same and I cannot even begin to tell you the many lessons that I have learned from these people. I am constantly laughing at the funny things that come out of their mouths...


No I did not take this picture of Lau around Halloween. This is Lau. He likes to dress up in... bizarre outfits. Lau also calls me every night before I come to work and leaves me messages on my answering machine. It is usually him singing to me "Oh Lindsey you, you got what I need." or "Hey Lindsey you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind! Hey Lindsey...". A funny thing about Lau is that he doesn't have any toes but still insists that his toes are cold and he needs another blanket over them to keep them warm. Not only is Lau one of the funniest people I know he is also one of the sweetest. Every morning he gives me a snickers or a big bag of M&M's.

Lau- "You have a rose in your eye and it sparkles."

Lau- "I know I don't have any toes, but Lindsey will you marry me?"

Lau- "Will you cook me some bacon?"
Me-"Sure where is it?"
Lau- "It is in the melting freezer."

Sadly I don't have a picture of Brian. Brian is an interesting character that seems to be in his own little world. He likes to get a reaction out of people by yelling out swear words. I'm ashamed to say that I think it is hilarious so it takes all of my will power to keep a straight face when I am telling him that he shouldn't do so.

Me- "What is so funny?"
Brian- " The cat."
Me- "What cat?"
Brian- "The cat at the pet store."
Me- "What happened with the cat?"
Brian- "The cat licked me."



Diane is the one that, as Amie likes to put it, "Damned me to hell." When I first met Diane she was the most harsh person that I had ever met. I felt as though I was constantly "walking on eggshells." She was like a volcano, you never knew when she was going to go off you just knew that she eventually would and that it wasn't going to be good. I believe that no matter how coarse a person is they have a squishy inside. Some people are just harder to get through than others. Working with Diane I was determined to break through to the "squish". So I decided that I would no matter how she treated me I was going to act like she was my best friend. It was scary because I am not used to people yelling at me for no reason but in the end it was well worth it. I got Diane to laugh! I got her to laugh! This was unheard of. Pretty soon Diane was telling me that I was pretty, that she really liked me because I was really nice AND that I was her number 1 favorite staff to work with. Shocker, more than you know.

Diane- "I can't find someone to love me like Carl loves Laura, no matter how much I brush my teeth."

Diane- "Is that your tripod?" (pointing to my ipod)

Diane- "My closet is too small for all my clothes."
Me- "Well maybe if you put away your winter clothes then you would have more room."
Diane- "No then my closet would be empty. I like to look rich and like I have a lot of stuff."



Unfortunately I don't get to work with Jerry anymore because he moved to a different house. Jerry always use to say that he was my father. I would always ask him If that was the case then where he has been all my life and what the heck did he do with my child support money? We would always end up laughing hysterically. One night I noticed a picture of a black woman on his keychain. I asked Jerry who it was, he said that he didn't know, he had found it on the sidewalk and attached it to his keychain. About ten minutes later he said that it was his model girlfriend, and my new mom. Oh and Jerry prefers his bacon burnt as you can see from the picture above. In fact he likes it so burnt that when you drop it, it shatters.

Jerry-Where I'm from we don't wash our dishes
Me- "oh really....where are you from?"
Jerry-"Out of the country."
Me- "And where would that be?"
Jerry- "Indiana"
Me-"Jerry you do realize that Indiana is in the United States?"
Jerry-" No its not! I'm from Mexico."



This is Terrie. She was the very first client that I ever worked with. Terrie was non-verbal and confined to a wheelchair. One thing that I loved about her was her sense of humor. She loved to make fun of me. One day she said that I should be a client rather than the staff. (Keep in mind she is typing this into her keyboard that would talk for her.) When I asked her if I could be her roomate her eyes got really big as if she had seen a ghost and she mouthed the words NO. Sadly Terrie past away in February. Being with her in her last hours was the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I miss her so much and probably learned the most from her. Her cheerful attitude amongst her dim situation never ceased to shock me.